lol The long ones good.
My mobile is full of jokes.
A dwarf goes to the doctors complaining about a sore fanny. Doctor gets his scissors out and snips a bit. Dwarf says "That good, it feels better, what did you do?" Doctor replies "I've trimmed the top off your wellies".
Family driving behind a dustbin lorry when a large dildo flys out and hits the windscreen. To hide her embarrassment, the mother turns to her young kinds and says "That was a big insect". To which her 7 yeard son says "I'm suprised it could fly with a cock that size".
Man lying in bed after sex with his new Thai wife. She keeps stroking his cock. He says "Do you like my cock that much?". She says "No, I just miss mine".
A young lad comes home and says to his dad, "I'm not a virgin anymore", dad says "Congratulations son, I will take you to the cinema to celebrate". Young lad replies "Not today dad, my arse still hurts".
REMEMBER : A woman is like a toilet. She's either Free, Taken, Engaged, Out Of Order, Taking The Piss or Full Of Shit.
Two nuns being raped down a country lane. First nun says "Forgive them lord, for they not know what they are doing". Second nun says "My god, this fucker does".
Zoo keeper says to Knutico "The gorilla is on heat and we need someone to have sex with it. Would you concider shagging it for £500?". Knutico replies "I will on three conditions, ONE my family don't find out. TWO I don't have to kiss it, THREE I need a couple of weeks to get the money together".